Be a Blessing by Letting Others Bless You, November 30
Inside the Cancer Journey: Daily Reflections for Those Coping with Cancer
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By Jenni Ritzert
… serve one another humbly in love (Galatians 5:13b).
When my husband, Mark, was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, I immediately went into “support mode.” There seemed to be no time for us to take it all in, to breathe, to rest, or to admit this was our current reality. We jumped in with both feet, trying to figure out how to beat this thing. I read ALL the material the hospital provided, went to all doctor visits and took copious notes, and kept up with the calendar and his medications so nothing would be missed. It seemed we were operating in disbelief—this couldn’t be happening. At the same time, we did our best to take actions with urgency, while trying to remain positive and hopeful.
Years ago, I had been a caregiver for my dad. Somehow I handled that while I worked full time, raised teenagers, and kept up with life responsibilities. I survived those days, so why would this be different? As friends and family regularly asked if/how they could help, I would just thank them and say we were handling things pretty well. It could not have been further from the truth. This time, it was my best friend, my soulmate, my partner in life—we shared the same heart and the same hopes and dreams. We planned to retire, travel the world, and grow old together. I realized that by not allowing help, I was too tired to be fully present for Mark.
One day, a friend asked me very sincerely if there was anything she could do to help. Leah even mentioned specific things she could do. Mark was having some procedures done and I had been sleeping in his hospital room. I asked if she might be able to water our plants. She gladly replied, “Yes, I can do that!” A weight was lifted. I relinquished one responsibility and I did not feel like a failure. Wow! Maybe I could do this again? It blessed us, and Leah felt blessed.
Other people could do many of the things I was doing, but I could not give up being there for my husband. As today’s verse reminds us, God gives all of us the blessing of serving each other in love, and I needed to become more open to being on the receiving end of that serving.
You may be the person who helps others, so it may be difficult for you to ask for help. That is completely understandable. But consider the “airplane safety” scenario where the flight attendant explains it is important for you to breathe through the oxygen mask first so you are able to help the child traveling with you. It is okay to ask for and accept help. When you do, you will be better able to stay well—not only for your own mental and physical health, but also so you can provide better care for your loved one. Give it a try. Be a blessing by letting others bless you.
Pray: Loving God, thank You for placing authentic and compassionate people in my life who sincerely want to be helpful. I want to say “yes” when people ask to serve me with the hands and feet of Jesus. Please allow me to give up some control during this scary time and to cast my cares on You. When it seems overwhelming, help me find someone who can hold me up and walk with me. I pray this in Jesus’ name. Amen.
Your Turn: What needs do you have that others could provide, that would relieve some of your or your loved one’s stresses? Be specific. Start your list by writing five areas where you could use assistance:
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Think about who you would feel comfortable asking for help and accepting it from. Saying “yes” can help.
Jenni Ritzert, Cancer Caregiver
Jenni’s husband, Mark, passed away after a courageous battle with pancreatic cancer. They benefited in amazing ways from a Cancer Companions class called “Seeing God in your Cancer Journey.” Mark was able to fully realize God’s extravagant love, and Jenni learned to lean on God and others throughout those difficult times. Jenni retired in 2020 from Wright Patterson Air Force Base. She prays the devotionals she wrote will help caregivers as they journey through cancer with their family and friends.
Cancer Companion’s vision for the future is for every person impacted by cancer to know the hope, love, and grace of Jesus and that every oncology team has included faith in their treatment toolbox. By 2033, Cancer Companions will provide 5 million engagements through cancer prayers, scriptures and interactions to those impacted by cancer. Engagements include; social media outreach, e-newsletters, prayer team requests, 30 days of Cancer Prayer event, and volunteer connections.
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