A Flying Trapeze, March 19
Daily Reflections from Inside the Cancer Journey
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Written by Karen Tripp
“Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. Husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself” (Ephesians 5:22, 28 NIV).
As a child, I loved watching the flying trapeze. I’d strain my neck to watch the bejeweled lady release the bar just in time for the man to catch her. Would her searching fingers find the safety of his arms? Can you imagine trusting someone enough to let go of the bar, or trusting yourself enough to catch them? Maybe it would be easier to be a clown. But if you are going to experience the thrill of the catch, you have to let go of the bar.
Marriage can be a lot like the flying trapeze. Life’s fears, like cancer, can make you hold on to the bar even tighter. Your spouse, who you always talked to about everything, you now talk to less about the future, the fatigue, the test results, and especially the fears. Cancer can make it frightening to let go:
“OK, go ahead. Let go.”
“What? I’m not letting go. You let go.”
“Why would I let go? You don’t look like you’re ready to catch me.”
“I’ll get ready to catch you as soon as you let go.”
“You’re kidding, right?”
You can see the problem.
God knew marriage would be scary, so He gave us some marriage instructions. First, God tells wives to submit to their husbands (see Ephesians 5:22). No one likes submitting. Yet submitting is the ultimate act of trust, the epitome of letting go of the trapeze bar. You have to let go of believing that you are the only one who knows what’s best. Letting go of the bar is trusting that, even in his mistakes, your husband never wants to see you fall.
God’s second piece of instruction is to tell husbands to love their wives as their own bodies (see Ephesians 5:28). This means as a husband, you must not only live each day ready to catch your wife, but live knowing that saving your wife is more important than saving yourself. Loving your wife is being there to catch her when she’s too scared to let go of the bar—or even when she’s pulling away from you with all her might.
Don’t worry. Jesus is the net. He knows you’re going to fall sometimes. That’s why He is there to save you, then to bounce you back to try again.
So why do trapeze artists risk missing the catch? Wouldn’t it be safer to take the clown job with the big red nose and the funny car? Well, they do it for the sweetness of the catch.
When searching hands find strong arms, suddenly a marriage sounds like:
“I can’t believe she let go.”
And…
“I can’t believe he caught me.”
When both partners trust enough to risk falling and find themselves safely in each other’s arms, marriage stops looking like a wall of fears and begins to look like an ocean of possibilities. Keep reaching out and soon you’ll be able to think of nothing but the next great catch.
Pray: Dear heavenly Father, we thank You for the gift of marriage. You provide great love and strength for us through this union. Help us take the risk and fully trust in one another to experience the full blessing of what You have given us. Amen.
Your Turn: Is there a place where God may be challenging you to let go of the bar and trust? Are you willing to take the risk of letting go? Ask Him for His help and give it a try.
Karen Tripp, MS, LMFT, Cancer Caregiver
Karen is the Executive Director of Cancer Companions, the premiere national Christian cancer ministry (https://www.cancercompanion.org). Her roles have included authoring several Christian books including God is Bigger Than Your Cancer and working as a licensed marriage and family therapist. She is a daughter of a colon cancer survivor. Karen uses her experience to teach how to step into another person’s struggle to help build their faith while strengthening your own.
Cancer Companion’s vision for the future is for every person impacted by cancer to know the hope, love, and grace of Jesus and that every oncology team has included faith in their treatment toolbox. By 2033, Cancer Companions will provide 5 million engagements through cancer prayers, scriptures and interactions to those impacted by cancer. Engagements include; social media outreach, e-newsletters, prayer team requests, 30 days of Cancer Prayer event, and volunteer connections.
To learn more about our ministry and the services we provide visit our website by clicking here.
Kenneth J. Weber
My husband Ken had a strong faith. We he was first diagnosed with Lung Cancer and was successful with his treatments, he went to our minister to ask "Why Me?" Our minister shared this bible verse with him and it became his theme for life. 2 Corinthians 1:4 "He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us." Ken used this verse as he worked with many Cancer patients throughout the remainder of his life. His Lung Cancer returned in September 2021 and he passed on this date in 2022. He was loved by many people and his faith through his cancer journey is inspirational to many.
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