God's Perfect Love
by Ashley Taylor
"I cried out to God for help; I cried out to God to hear me. When I was in distress, I sought the Lord; at night I stretched out untiring hands, and I would not be comforted. You are the God who performs miracles; you display your power among the peoples." (Psalm 77:1-2, 14)
When my husband, James, and I married, we knew we wanted to have children someday. Several years later, we decided we were ready. After eight months of hoping and praying and starting to wonder if something may be wrong, I was pregnant. The hope of this child was quickly shattered. I was diagnosed with an ectopic pregnancy, which meant the pregnancy occurred outside of the uterus and was not viable. About five months later, we were thrilled to be expecting again. A few weeks after that joy, I had a miscarriage. Sadness, anger and pain filled my heart. “I cried out to God for help; I cried out to God to hear me” (Psalm 77:1). I wondered why this was happening to us. I didn’t know if I could handle the possibility of another loss. Maybe, James and I were not meant to have children. At first, “when I was in distress, I sought the Lord; at night I stretched out untiring hands, and I would not be comforted” (Psalm 77:2). I wanted to wake up and find I had had a terrible dream. The schemes of the enemy were in motion.
Not immediately, but with time and immersing myself in God’s Word, through prayer and conversation with God, and with the love of family and friends, I began to see the blessings that had come out of this difficult time. My relationship with my Heavenly Father grew and became stronger. I was reminded of how much God loves me, even when He is silent. In His great timing, our prayers were answered and our daughter, Grace, was born. As Psalm 77:14 says, “You are the God who performs miracles; you display your power among the peoples.” I experienced the miracle of life firsthand with rejoicing. Grace was named for God’s grace. When I was diagnosed with cancer, all the uncertainties that come with this diagnosis were scary—prognosis, surgery, radiation, chemotherapy, effects on family, finances and so much more. However, after what I had been through previously, I did have peace knowing that God was with me. He had already walked through such difficult times with me. He had proved to me—over and over—that in His love He would be with me through whatever might come. He had never let me down, even when He didn’t answer me in the way I might want.
Throughout the testing and the waiting of this cancer trial, I felt like God was preparing me for whatever we would face—together. We would take each day one day at a time. I am undeserving of His perfect love, but know it is the gift of His grace, for which I am ever grateful. The enemy would not win this battle because every victory belongs to God.
We all as God’s people face challenges throughout our lives. How have you experienced God’s love and power on your life’s difficult paths? Remember His past faithfulness, as you face today’s trials with Him.
Pray: Heavenly Father, with praise and adoration, I thank you for your perfect love that is offered through your grace. Amen.
Your Turn: Listen to AJ Michalka sing “Desert Song” and think about God’s perfect love for you. She sings, "No weapon formed against me shall remain, I will rejoice, I will declare, God is my victory and He is here." What do these words mean to you?
Ashley Taylor, Cancer Survivor
Ashley is married to James, and they have two daughters, Grace and Hannah. All four are big Tar Heel fans, having attended the same school, UNC-Chapel Hill. In 2020 Ashley obtained her roofing license to help with her family's business. She is a breast cancer survivor. She has been grateful for the opportunity to join the devo team for Cancer Companions, to reach out to others for God’s glory for His goodness in her cancer journey.