Romantic Mindfulness
by Dan Held
“How right they are to adore you!” (Song of Solomon 1:4)
As a cancer caregiver, I could not help noticing that my wife’s cancer diagnosis and treatment took a toll on her own body image. Her self-reflection in the mirror revealed to her that she had cancer. She somehow saw “damaged goods.” Yet, when I looked at her, I saw the same woman that I found attractive and fell in love with many years ago. Same eyes, same nose, same mouth and cheeks and forehead. Same “Tippin chin,” as it’s called per her mother’s maiden name.
When I kiss her lips, they are still the same ones I kissed at our wedding altar upon the blessing of our minister and congregation.
Sue was, is, and always will be my valentine.
Solomon, in writing the biblical lyrics for what we often call the Old Testament “Song of Songs,” references what his readers and hearers understood to be the chosen people of God being loved by God in spite of their flaws and imperfections. We, as Christians, more commonly interpret this scripture as being about Christ’s love for us as His bride, warts and all.
As the body and bride of Christ we all have many shortcomings. We sometimes fret over our own appearance and see cancer within us. Our own body image as Christians is often quite negative. Yet Jesus would on this day greet us as His beloved valentine.
Should we not do the same for each other, patients and caregivers alike?
The psalmist writes of how God is mindful of us as the work of his own creation (Psalm 8:4) because we are wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). And so today we live into the moment of new embrace and sensual pleasure in each other’s presence. We celebrate Valentine’s Day by being mindful with all our senses--our sight, sound, touch, smell, and taste of each other’s divinely created bodies. Our eyes, ears, skin, nose, and mouth all celebrate God’s gift of sensual pleasure in our midst. And to our own special beloved, this day let us sing with Solomon, “How right they are to adore you!” (Song of Solomon 1:4)
Pray: O God who is ever mindful of us as the fruit of your own creation, thank you for delighting in our beauty, warts and all. Grant that this day we may be mindful of being made in your image, finding validation of your beauty within and between us. Amen.
Your Turn: Use this day as an opportunity to practice mindfulness in the presence of another wonderful creation of God, using God’s gift of sight, sound, touch, smell and taste to express your love.
Dan is a cancer caregiver who lives with his wife (Sue) of 55 years in Dayton, Ohio, where Sue has been free from breast cancer and colon cancer for two years! Dan is an ordained pastor and a licensed therapist with a heart for families touched by cancer at any stage. He is dedicated to promoting the message of more love and less fear in all aspects of his ministry and life. Check out his blog at www.danielkheld.com.