“At this the man’s face fell. He went away sad, because he had great wealth” (Mark 10:22 NIV).

We downsized eight years ago. It took months—if not years—to clear the attic, the storage building, and closets. My wife and I have different strategies for purging. She sees the sentimental value in items, while I am more of a bull in a china shop. What to keep and what to discard can be an agonizing decision. Our scripture describes the response of a wealthy man unwilling to part with his possessions and follow Jesus. He went away sorrowful.

“[Love] always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails” (1 Corinthians 13:7-8a NIV).

On March 25, 1995, James and I promised to take one another as husband and wife, to have and to hold from that day forward … in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part. James is not only my husband but also my best friend. Life together is not always hunky-dory because we live in a broken world where neither life nor marriage is perfect. We have experienced incredible joy and immense sadness and disappointment.

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure” (Hebrews 6:19a NIV).

In December of 2018, my wife Dominique and I set sail on our first cruise together. We boarded the ship provided by Carnival Cruise Lines in Miami, Florida. The immensity of the ship alone was breath-taking. As we boarded the ship, I couldn’t help but notice the size of the ropes that tethered the ship in place. The ropes looked like giant pretzels braided just right, securing the massive structure to the dock. Awestruck by the sheer size of the ocean liner, I searched for the anchor.

“So, whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God” (1 Corinthians 10:31 NIV).

God saved me as an adult, when I was going through a difficult time in my life. One issue our family was facing was unstable employment—which, with two young girls to support at the time, was weighing heavily on my heart. For a while, I had felt like God was trying to teach me that He would provide. All I needed to do was trust Him. But it is hard to trust when you feel like your world is falling apart. I questioned Him. Do You even see me? Do You really care about this situation?

“Do not let Hezekiah deceive you. He cannot deliver you from my [the king of Assyria’s] hand. Do not let Hezekiah persuade you to trust in the LORD when he says, ‘The LORD will surely deliver us’” (2 Kings 18:29-30a NIV).

Who do we listen to? Every news outlet has its slant on the world’s events. Who do we believe? Who do we trust? The humorous adage says, “an expert is someone who lives over fifty miles away.” We really do not know the people behind these sources. We do not know their foibles. They come to us unscathed. But we know everyone has faults and shortcomings. Again, who do we trust?

“He got up, rebuked the wind, and said to the waves, ‘Quiet! Be still!’ Then the wind died down and it was completely calm” (Mark 4:39 NIV).

A few months after my initial cancer diagnosis, my family and I went to the coast to spend a few days. It would be good for us all. We could use the R&R.

My brother-in-law and his son (my nephew) joined us. My nephew had just returned from an “awesome” beach trip with his Uncle Kevin, who has an “amazing” boat. Every day they had zipped up and down the inner coastal waters, skiing, bodyboarding, and soaking up the sun.

“How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and day after day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me?” (Psalm 13:1-2 NIV)

Cancer is a great time to yell at God. Sometimes you just need to tell God that you feel He is doing a bad job. You might need to yell at Him for a while. You might need to scream and cry and just get it out. Yes, you heard me right. When the diagnosis comes, when the side effects come, when the continual appointments come, when death comes … sometimes you need to tell God that it seems like He is terrible at being God. Tell Him as often as you like.

“He counts the number of the stars; He calls them all by name” (Psalm 147:4 NKJV).

I remember a cold rainy day in New York City. My family was looking for something to do inside. We decided on the planetarium. We relaxed and reclined in our comfortable seats. The presentation began. Our spaceship took off into outer space! We left Earth and eventually our solar system. The immensity of our galaxy was mind-blowing. The number of galaxies continued to multiply the further we traveled from home.

Today’s scripture alludes to the infinite nature of God by saying that “He counts the number of the stars; He calls them all by name.” Imagine looking through a telescope and attempting to count the stars on a calculator. How ridiculous! I cannot even begin to fathom the enormity of God. And somehow that reality brings me comfort. I take great delight in knowing God is not overwhelmed by the expanse of the universe. I can let go of straining to understand the mysteries of life. A God who can count the stars and know them by name can handle anything that comes my way.

“Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise” (Hebrews 13:15 NIV).

I guess I’m like most women; I love getting flowers. It’s kind of silly, really. It’s not like flowers are good for anything. Yet, my grandmother told me that flowers are the most gracious of gifts because they don’t do anything except make you happy. It’s true. Flowers don’t have to do anything for me to love them. I just love them because of what they are.

In our loving relationships it’s easy to think, “I love them because …

• “They make me laugh.”

• “They’d do anything for me.”

• “They hold me together when I’m falling apart.”

“Give praise to the Lord, proclaim his name; make known among the nations what he has done. Sing to him, sing praise to him; tell of all his wonderful acts. Glory in his holy name, let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice. Look to the Lord and his strength; seek his face always” (Psalm 105:1-4 NIV).

Talk about being unprepared for what is about to happen—yikes! A couple of weeks after my cancer diagnosis, I entered the hospital for a surgery that included a sentinel node biopsy and a lumpectomy. My husband, James, and I thought we knew exactly what to expect that day. It turned out, we did not know what all was involved in having a sentinel node biopsy. The first part of the biopsy is lymphatic mapping to find the sentinel node before the surgery begins.

“Then they drew near to the village where they were going, and He indicated that He would have gone farther. But they constrained Him, saying, ‘Abide with us, for it is toward evening. And the day is far spent.’ And He went in to stay with them. Now it came to pass, as He sat at the table with them, that He took bread, blessed and broke it, and gave it to them. Then their eyes were opened and they knew Him; and He vanished from their sight” (Luke 24:28-31 OSB).

Two men who were passionate followers of Jesus were on their way to Emmaus, a small town about seven miles from Jerusalem. They were overwhelmed by the recent events of Christ’s crucifixion. They were so distraught they did not even notice that Jesus was in their midst.

“Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Corinthians 12:8-9a, 10b NIV).

Have you ever felt weakness in your body and been tempted to think in some negative way about, well, almost everything else as well? Maybe at times like these you find yourself praying less because prayer doesn’t seem to be working. Maybe in the beginning of your cancer journey, you prayed for the biopsy to come back “negative—no cancer” and that’s not what happened. When we’re sick it’s so easy to think in a negative way about God’s power to answer prayer.

“Give us this day our daily bread” (Matthew 6:11 NIV).

The demands of cancer will likely surpass anything you have ever experienced. Dealing with the disease may take everything you have—physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, financially, and relationally. Even that may not be enough. Being able to ask God for what you need will be essential.

“I sought the LORD, and He heard me, and delivered me from all my fears” (Psalm 34:4 NKJV).

Does anyone remember the slogan “No Fear” that was on T-shirts a few years ago? I used to think the people wearing the shirts were fooling themselves. Everyone has fears. Sometimes the fears are more prevalent and intense.

Cancer can heighten our feelings of fear. There are so many unknowns surrounding a cancer diagnosis.

“As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17 NIV).

Life—especially life with cancer—is a team sport, and no one wins alone. But what are we meant to do when we feel alone and unseen in our cancer journey? No matter how helpful and involved our family or support network is, it's still possible to feel alone and scared—because quite honestly, no one's in our heads but us, and no one can sit in the chemo chair or undergo surgery but us. The good news is that there is no need for us to feel alone in our cancer journey.